Posts Tagged ‘Mistakes’

Mistake #6: Not Understanding the Priority of People Over Programs

Sunday, July 25th, 2010

“If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.” 2 Corinthians 11:30 (ESV)

This is the sixth in a series of blog posts called, “My Top Ten Mistakes in Ministry (That I Can Share Publicly.)” After many years of ministry experience as a church planter, pastor and seminary professor, I think I’ve finally learned that one of the best kept secrets to surviving well in the ministry is to stop making the same old mistakes that others (like me) have been making for decades. Instead, let’s all start making some brand new, bold, innovative and creative mistakes!

We began this series with an introduction called, “Ladies First” in which veteran church planter wife, Shari Thomas, addressed the tough topic, What I Wish I Had Known About Church Planting from the perspective of the church planter’s/pastor’s spouse. We then took a look at:

Mistake #6: Not Understanding the Priority of People Over Programs

It’s been thought by all of us in Christian ministry (both clergy and laity) at one time or another: “I love God, and I love the ministry, but it’s just people that I really don’t like!” In his best-selling book, The Master Plan of Evangelism, Robert Coleman writes, “When Jesus’ plan is reflected upon, the basic philosophy is so different from that of the modern church that its implications are nothing less than revolutionary….His concern was not with programs to reach the multitudes but with people whom the multitudes would follow….People were to be His method of winning the world to God. The initial objective of Jesus’ plan was to enlist men who could bear witness to His life and carry on His work after He returned to the Father.”

I had the privilege of having Dr. Coleman as one of my professors when I was in seminary in Chicago (Trinity). I’ll always remember his incessant repetition of this same basic concept over and over again: while in the ministry if we don’t actively, constantly fight against it, we will inevitably become nothing more than mere “ministry program administrators—thereby failing to be like Jesus who always made people (not programs) his highest priority.

In Jesus’ words to Peter, after the resurrection, we learn again that one of the greatest ways we can show our love to Christ is not merely by doing great ministry exploits for him, but by showing sacrificial love to his sheep–to love deeply and well those He loves and those for whom he laid down His life. With these lenses on, take a new look now at these ancient words of the resurrected Christ to Peter:

“So when they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, Simon, son of John, do you love Me more than these?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Tend My lambs.” He said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of John, do you love Me?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” He said to him, “Shepherd My sheep.” He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of John, do you love Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, “Do you love Me?” And he said to Him, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.” Jesus said to him, “Tend My sheep.

Here we are meant to learn a valuable lesson about life and ministry that is very easily missed if we’re not very careful. The lesson? One of the greatest ways to show our love to Jesus is by showing our love to His sheep—especially when they don’t love us well. It’s relatively easy learning to lead well. But it’s really hard learning to love well.

Hear his voice today asking “Do you love me?” Then hear his answer, “Tend my sheep.” In other words, love those whom He loves–lay down your life to shepherd well especially those sheep who are back-biting, betraying, whining, unappreciative and arrogant. Where in the world can you find the power to do that? It begins by realizing how deeply the Good Shepherd keeps loving you in the face of all your back-biting, betraying, whining, lack of appreciation and arrogance.

Oh, and by the way, since we haven’t addressed it since the introductory message in this series by Shari Thomas, I thought it might be good for all of us to be reminded that one of those people in your church in need of your very special love—is your spouse. I wish someone had told me what it means to understand and love my wife well—especially during our early church planting years.

If you haven’t read Shari Thomas blog entry that  addressed the tough topic, What I Wish I Had Known About Church Planting from the perspective of the church planter’s/pastor’s spouse then please do. If you have, then please read it again.

Again, I long for you not to make the same mistakes so many of us have made in the past three decades of ministry. Instead, as Bob Logan says, “Go make new, creative, innovative mistakes!” As our beloved Steve Brown would say, “You think about that.”

Steve Childers is the President & CEO of Global Church Advancement, an inter-denominational ministry that provides church planting training, consultations, and resources for church planters, pastors and missionaries throughout the world. Steve has trained Christian leaders from more than 50 countries (curriculum in five major global languages), representing over 200 denominations and mission agencies in 5 continents (& 5 languages). Steve is also an author, Professor of Practical Theology (since 1995) and the Director of the Doctoral program at Reformed Theological Seminary, in Orlando, Florida, where he teaches church planting, missions, evangelism and spiritual formation. To learn more about GCA:

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Mistake #5: Not Understanding that the Way Up is the Way Down

Friday, April 16th, 2010

“If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.” 2 Corinthians 11:30 (ESV)

This is the fifth in a series of blog posts called, “My Top Ten Mistakes in Ministry (That I Can Share Publicly.)” After many years of ministry experience as a church planter, pastor and seminary professor, I think I’ve finally learned that one of the best kept secrets to surviving well in the ministry is to stop making the same old mistakes that others (like me) have been making for decades. Instead, let’s all start making some brand new, bold, innovative and creative mistakes!

We began this series with an introduction called, “Ladies First” in which veteran church planter wife, Shari Thomas, addressed the tough topic, What I Wish I Had Known About Church Planting from the perspective of the church planter’s/pastor’s spouse. We then took a look at:

This time we’ll take a brief look at another common mistake church leaders make that I wish someone had told me about before I went into the ministry.

Mistake #5: Not Understanding that the Way Up is the Way Down

One of the supreme glories of the Gospel is that it is primarily through weakness that God chooses to show His strength. And it’s through foolishness that God loves to manifest His wisdom. The Apostle Paul makes this abundantly clear when he writes,

“For consider your calling, brethren, that there were not many wise according to the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble; but God has chosen the foolish things of the world to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to shame the things which are strong, and the base things of the world and the despised, God has chosen, the things that are not, that He might nullify the things that are, that no man should boast before God. (1Cor 1:26-29).

In their excellent book entitled Liberating Ministry From the Success Syndrome by Kent and Barbara Hughes (required reading for all church leaders!) they write, “To you who deem yourself unusually ordinary be encouraged: God must have liked ordinary people because he made so many of us!” I wish someone had told me years ago not to hold my weaknesses in disdain—but to know that God’s plan is to work through my foolishness and weakness so that He might manifest His wisdom and strength.

I also wish someone had explained to me more clearly that God’s kingdom is an upside down kingdom where “God is opposed to the proud but He gives grace to the humble.” and “Whoever exalts himself shall be humbled; and whoever humbles himself shall be exalted “and “When pride comes, then comes dishonor, But with the humble is wisdom.”

And I wish someone had helped me understand more deeply these profound words written by Oswald Chambers:

“God can achieve his purpose either through the absence of human power and resources, or the abandonment of reliance on them. All through history God has chosen and used nobodies, because their unusual dependence on him made possible the unique display of his power and grace. He chose and used somebodies only when they renounced dependence on their natural abilities and resources.”

To those of you who consider yourself unusually gifted (you know who you are!) this means you must be very careful not to trust in your strengths illegitimately. In fact, unless you humble yourself and renounce your dependence upon them, all your labor and even your fruit is apt to be in vain. It will all be burned away (see Hughes’ book for more details).

What are some of the ways we can know we’re at risk in this area?  In C. Peter Wagner’s book, Humility, he lists 5 Signposts Along the Road to Pride:

1) Yearning for Praise and Accolades
2) Keeping Score
3) Rejoicing in others failures
4) Resenting others successes
5) Compulsively defending yourself

The paradox of grace is that the way up is the way down. One of the reasons there is often such little display of God’s presence and power in many of our lives and ministries today is because of the unknown root sin of pride and self-reliance. The Bible teaches that God’s presence and power normally dwells in a humble and contrite heart. “But to this one I will look, to him who is humble and contrite of spirit, and who trembles at My Word” (Is 66:2).

With this truth in mind, I wish someone had made clear to me early in my ministry that coming to the cross of Jesus Christ is not meant by God to be just a one time thing for us (at conversion) but an ongoing process. The Apostle Paul wrote “…just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, so walk in Him” (Colossians 2:6). Coming to God in humility means learning to keep coming to Him in repentance and faith through the cross of Jesus Christ.

Paul wrote,  “May I never boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, through which the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world” (Galatians 6:14). As God progressively shows us our sin of pride we must learn the secret of coming in humility again and again and again to the cross of Jesus Christ for not only pardon but also for power to change.

It is only at the cross that the streams of God’s transforming grace will begin to flow into our lives. Like water, God’s grace and power always flows down to the lowest place. As you respond to this reminder, prayerfully meditate on the words of the nineteenth century hymn writer, Horatius Bonar,

“I heard the voice of Jesus say, “Behold, I freely give the living water. Thirsty one, stoop down and drink and live”.

——————————

Childers

Steve Childers is the President & CEO of Global Church Advancement, an inter-denominational ministry that provides church planting training, consultations, and resources for church planters, pastors and missionaries throughout the world. Steve has trained Christian leaders from more than 50 countries (curriculum in five major global languages), representing over 200 denominations and mission agencies in 5 continents (& 5 languages). Steve is also an author, Professor of Practical Theology (since 1995) and the Director of the Doctoral program at Reformed Theological Seminary, in Orlando, Florida, where he teaches church planting, missions, evangelism and spiritual formation. To learn more about GCA:

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Mistake #4: Not Understanding the Difference Between Pursuing the Grace of God or the God of Grace

Thursday, February 4th, 2010

“If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.” 2 Corinthians 11:30 (ESV)

This is the fifth in a series of blog posts called, “My Top Ten Mistakes in Ministry (That I Can Share Publicly.)” After many years of ministry experience as a church planter, pastor and seminary professor, I think I’ve finally learned that one of the best kept secrets to surviving well in the ministry is to stop making the same old mistakes that others (like me) have been making for decades. Instead, let’s all start making some brand new, bold, innovative and creative mistakes!

We began this series with an introduction called, “Ladies First” in which veteran church planter wife, Shari Thomas, addressed the tough topic, What I Wish I Had Known About Church Planting from the perspective of the church planter’s/pastor’s spouse. We then took a look at:

This time we’ll take a brief look at another common mistake church leaders make that I wish someone had told me about before I went into the ministry.

Mistake #4: Not Understanding the Difference Between Pursing the Grace of God and the God of Grace.

John Piper’s words still seem to be ringing in my ears after all these years: “Is God a means of grace in your life and ministry or is grace a means to God?” No one had ever asked me that kind of question before. In fact, it took me a while to even figure out what the question meant.

But when I finally understood it, I found myself wishing someone had dared to ask me that kind of penetrating, potentially life-changing question many years ago. Let me try to expound on this idea briefly.

The Ultimate Quest of Your Life & Ministry

In John 17:3 Jesus said, “And this is eternal life, that they may know Thee, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom Thou hast sent.” Here we are meant to learn that God’s goal for our lives is not merely to serve him in faithful ministry but primarily to know him, to love him, to glorify him and enjoy him.

Think of this question again: “Is God made a means to grace in your ministry or is grace made a means to God?” To put the question differently, “Does the quest of your life and the passion of your ministry terminate on God? Knowing Him? Enjoying Him? Glorifying Him?

Or is God brought in beside all your planning, techniques and ministry strategies in hope that he might somehow be the means of a great outpouring of grace on your ministry and in your life?  The big idea here is that it makes a tremendous difference whether the ultimate quest of your life and ministry is the grace of God or the God of grace.

Using God to Solve Your Problems or Using Your Problems to Find God?

One of the most fundamental questions is whether you will place God or yourself at the center of your ministry. The practical benefits of a God-centered focus in life and ministry are far-reaching. Author Larry Crabb makes the point that a leader with this perspective stops trying to “use God to solve his problems”. Instead such a leader learns how to “use his problems to find God”.

A very common problem among church planters, missionaries, and pastors, is that we begin to see ourselves primarily as servants of God or soldiers of God. Unknowingly, over time, our view of God becomes primarily that of a Master or a Commander-in-Chief. And those pictures of God are biblical and true, but there is so much more to a truly biblical view of God.

In John 15 Jesus said, “You are my friends.” There is a sense in which that’s richer than merely being a slave or a soldier.  Then in 1John 3:1 we read these astonishing words, “See how great a love the Father has bestowed upon us, that we should be called children of God.”

Stop and think about this: more than being a “friend” of Christ, because you are now “in Christ” you are also considered by God to be His child—one who is now loved with the highest of all loves, a love previously reserved by the eternal Father for His one and only Son! There is no stronger love in all the cosmos (Eph 3:14-20).

In Ephesians 5 we see another graphic picture of a bride and a bridegroom—the picture of intimate lovers. As a church leader never allow the imagery of what has been called the “John 3:16 of the Old Testament” to leave your mind and heart: “The LORD your God is in your midst, a victorious warrior. He will exult over you with joy. He will be quiet in His love. He will rejoice over you with shouts of joy” (Zeph 3:17).  Here we have the Commander-in-Chief (the Victorious Warrior) rejoicing over you as His child with shouts of joy.

The Lord is our Commander-in-Chief, and we are called to be “good soldiers of Jesus Christ”, putting on and utilizing all the spiritual armor (Eph. 6) that is now ours in Christ.  He is also our Master and we are called to be His “servants” availing ourselves of all of His means of grace so we might be called “faithful” at the end of this race. But we must never forget He is also our Friend, our Father and our Lover (and so much more).

The reason having a proper view of God is so critically important in your life and ministry is because it is so easy to be unknowingly:

  • Pursuing the Kingdom and not the King
  • Pursuing the Truth of God and not the God of Truth
  • Using God to solve your problems rather than using your problems to find God.

In other words, if you are not consciously fighting against it, you are at risk of falling prey to pursing the grace of God and not the God of grace.

Just before his death, Dr. Bill Bright, the founder of Campus Crusade spoke at Reformed Seminary in Orlando, Florida, where I’m on faculty (along with Steve Brown). He had a terminal respiratory disease. Many of us were told he might not live long enough to speak in chapel on the date he had been scheduled. So I’ll never forget watching this man of God being helped into the seminary chapel in a wheel chair with a oxygen tubes hooked under his nose. Here was without question one of the greatest visionary leaders of our generation. And he had come to preach to us as “a dying man to dying men”.

I found fascinating that the focus of his final message that morning was not on the importance of capturing a vision for reaching the world for Christ. That’s what I was expecting. But it was, to my surprise, a powerful message on the importance of capturing a vision for God in the fullness of all His attributes.

I’ll never forget Dr. Bright’s final challenge to us that day—to see God not merely as useful but instead to learn to see God primarily as beautiful.  It was just another way of saying, “Don’t merely pursue the grace of God. Pursue the God of grace”. I hope this helps you in that life-long process.

Steve Childers is the President & CEO of Global Church Advancement, an inter-denominational ministry that provides church planting training, consultations, and resources for church planters, pastors and missionaries throughout the world. Steve has trained Christian leaders from more than 50 countries (curriculum in five major global languages), representing over 200 denominations and mission agencies in 5 continents (& 5 languages). Steve is also an author, Professor of Practical Theology (since 1995) and the Director of the Doctoral program at Reformed Theological Seminary, in Orlando, Florida, where he teaches church planting, missions, evangelism and spiritual formation. To learn more about GCA:

http://www.facebook.com/GlobalChurchAdvancement

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My Top Ten Mistakes In Ministry–That I Can Share Publicly: Mistake # 2

Sunday, November 15th, 2009

“If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.” 2 Corinthians 11:30 (ESV)

Man Sorry for MistakesThis is the third in a series of blog posts called, “My Top Ten Mistakes in Ministry (That I Can Share Publicly)” After many years of ministry experience as a church planter, pastor and seminary professor I think I’ve finally learned that one of the best kept secrets to surviving well in the ministry is to stop making the same old mistakes that others (like me) have been making for decades. Instead, let’s all start making some brand new, bold, innovative and creative mistakes!

We began this series with an introduction called, “Ladies First” in which veteran church planter wife, Shari Thomas, addressed the tough topic, “What I Wish I Had Known About Church Planting” from the perspective of the church planter’s/pastor’s spouse. Last time we looked at Mistake #1 called, “Failing to Understand the Importance of How I Define Ministry Success.” This time we’ll take a brief look at Mistake #2 (these are in no intentional order) I wish someone had the wisdom and guts to tell me before I began church planting/pastoral ministry more than 30 years ago.

Mistake #2: Managing My Time And Not My Life

clock-headIn his classic article, “Tyranny of the Urgent”, Charles Hummel writes, “‘Have you ever wished for a thirty-hour day?’ Surely this extra time would relieve the tremendous pressure under which we live. Our lives leave a trail of unfinished tasks. Unanswered emails, unvisited friends, unread books and articles, etc., haunt quiet moments when we stop to evaluate. We desperately need relief.

But would a thirty-hour day really solve the problem? Wouldn’t we soon be just as frustrated as we are now with our twenty-four allotment? “A mother’s work is never done”, and neither is that of . . . any pastor. Nor will the passage of time help us catch up. Children grow in number and age to require more of our time. Greater experience and success in life and ministry normally bring more exacting assignments. So we find ourselves working more and enjoying it less.”

Our problem is often, unknowingly, allowing the urgent things in life to crowd out the truly important things. We all live in a constant tension between the urgent and the important.

The Gap Between the Compass and the Clock

There is an ongoing contrast between two things that continually influence our lives: the clock and the compass. Stephen Covey, in his book, First Things First, describes the clock as representing such things as our commitments, appointments,compassschedules, goals, activities; it’s how we use and manage our time. The compass represents our core life values, our conscience, our sense of personal vision and life mission; it’s what we believe is truly important in life and how we manage life.

The struggle comes when we experience a gap between the compass and the clock–when what we actually do with our time doesn’t contribute to what is truly most important in our life. In an effort to close the gap between the compass and the clock, many of us naturally turn to the field of “personal time management.” Traditional time management theory suggests that by doing things more efficiently, you’ll eventually gain control of your life and that increased control will bring personal peace and fulfillment.

Although there is much to gain from such things as planning, prioritizing and goal setting, the bottom line is that mere increased efficiency normally does not lessen the gap between the compass and the clock. In fact, I was a living example of someone who had learned how to get a lot more work done in less time, but what I was actually doing with my time was not at all what truly matters to me the most. This is why I wish someone had asked questions and said things to me like:

“How many pastors on their deathbed wish they had spent more time at the church?”

“The worst enemy of the best is often the good.”

The Answer is Not Learning to Get More Done in Less Time

The gap between what is deeply important to you (your compass) and the way you spend your time (your clock) cannot be closedTime_Management_Techniquesby simply learning to do more things more efficiently. The answer is not found in learning to get more things done in less time. In fact, increasing your time management efficiency can actually make things worse! What is needed is a new way of thinking—learning how to manage your life and not just your time, and learning how to shift your focus away from things that are urgent to the things that are trulyimportant.

Often, unless we take intentional, proactive steps to fight against it, we’ll inevitably become slaves to the “tyranny of the urgent”.  It’s been said that, “Anything less than a conscious commitment to the important is an unconscious commitment to the unimportant.”

In Isaiah 30:15 we read, “For thus the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel, has said, ‘In repentance and rest you shall be saved, In quietness and trust is your strength.’” At the root of our frantic propensity to overwork is the sin of pride—an exalted sense of our importance to the Kingdom of God. We secretly and arrogantly think things like: “If I dare to stop, the Kingdom of God just might not make it and my ministry would surely self-destruct!”

Some of us need to show our faith in God not by working harder but by working less!

Some of us have been hitting it too hard for too long, and we desperately need extended time to rest. For some it might be 6 months for others it might be 6 weeks, or maybe 6 days. For some of us the most spiritual thing we could do now is to go home and go to bed and sleep!

A seasoned missionary in Peru came up to me at a conference once to tell me that in all his years in the ministry, he has learned that there are two types of missionaries in Peru—those who take siestas (naps) every day and those who leave the field. He said, “If you don’t learn to take your siesta on your first term, you normally will not be back for your second term.”

Not Just Starting Well . . . But Finishing Well

It’s one thing to start ministry well. It’s another to finish well. We must remember (and keep reminding each other) that the ministry is not a sprint, but it’s a cross-country event. So we must pace ourselves. We must build into our lives a Sabbath Rhythm of work and rest, work and rest—daily, weekly, quarterly, yearly.

The Scriptures tell us, “When Jesus saw the crowd around him, he instructed his disciples to cross to the other side of the lake” (Matt 8:18). Jesus knew when it was time for him and his followers to pull away from the pressing demands of ministry. My prayer for you and for me is that we will too, before it’s too late.

Steve Childers is the President & CEO of Global Church Advancement, an inter-denominational ministry that provides Steve-Childers-Bio-Photochurch planting training, consultations, and resources for church planters, pastors and missionaries throughout the world. Steve has trained Christian leaders from more than 50 countries (curriculum in five major global languages) representing over 200 denominations and mission agencies. Steve is also an author, Professor of Practical Theology (since 1995) and the Director of the Doctoral program atReformed Theological Seminary, in Orlando, Florida, where he teaches church planting, missions, evangelism and spiritual formation.

To learn more about GCA:

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Research Findings on Church Planting Wives: 6 Primary Sources, 8 Secondary Sources

Sunday, September 13th, 2009

UnhappyWoman2

The following factors provided the greatest sources of satisfaction or stress for church planting wives. These findings are taken from a research study conducted in North American among PCA church planting spouses of various ethnicities in both urban and suburban settings. This research was conducted by Parakaleo—a gospel-centered ministry that is highly recommended by GCA and represented at all North American GCA training events. Parakaleo exists to strengthen the gospel spreading impact of church planting
by coming alongside church planting movements and church planting couples.
Through coaching, connecting, caring, and celebrating they facilitate training,
encouragement and care of church planters and their spouses. For more information contact Parakaleo staff Shari Thomas, shari@parakaleo.us or Tami Resch, tami@parakaleo.us

Six Primary Sources

1. The Husband

The greatest source of satisfaction or stress for the church planter spouse was the person and work of the husband as he is involved/uninvolved with his wife. The lack of a support system not only increases loneliness and isolation for the wife, it puts added pressure on the marriage. If a clergy couple is relying primarily on each other for support, the marriage may function well most of the time, yet a narrow support system will become a problem when either one is not able to fulfill that role (McMinn 2004).

“We have a strong marriage and I know my husband is committed to me. If I weren’t called to do this type of work, he would quit. We both have a profound respect that God has called us together as one flesh and He will not pull us in different directions. My husband practices the scripture of laying down his life for me as Christ laid down His life for the church. I can submit to that kind of husband.”

2. Support System

The major factor which restricts clergy spouses from experiencing the support they need is that their primary support system comes from their husbands-men who tend to be absent from the home evenings and weekends. The study also indicates that wives do not talk about their husband since this could jeopardize his career (McMinn, 2004).

“It would have been most helpful if I had connection with other church planting spouses early on.”

3. Sabbath Rest

“The highest levels of exhaustion were caused by overextending ourselves because of perceived expectations that we feared we were not meeting. Overall, we were not trusting the Lord.”

“We did not take regular days off or vacations. Nor did we know about keeping boundaries. So a lot has been learned and changed over the years.”

4. Reliance on Christ

“I attribute my spiritual and emotional health to daily repentance, and to understanding how great my sin is, to the ability to laugh, and balancing my heart for the church with the fact that the church is not my life or my significance.”

“…it is God alone, salvation, prayer, his goodness, his very presence in the Spirit.”

“While I give head assent to relying on Christ, my life style shows my functional belief system which is in myself and human effort”.

5. Boundary Ambiguity

Ambiguity is endemic to ministry. To the clergy family, the system is not clear. All members of the family participate either directly or indirectly in the church. There is some role expectation of the congregation which must be fulfilled by the minister, his spouse, and even his children. This level of ambiguity causes high levels of stress for clergy spouses (Lee, 1988).

a) Role Ambiguity

“My greatest challenge has been how the ambiguous role of the cp spouse would affect me. The struggle of knowing church planting was my passion, being trained in ministry, and yet not knowing how to interface this without having a defined position was difficult. I often functionally operated as an assistant minister yet without title, pay, or decision making power.”

b) Emotional Ambiguity

“How much should my husband tell me? I realize I am his primary support, but it’s hard to love people well when I know how they have hurt him.”

c) Physical Ambiguity

The constant unknowns of facility and where we will be located coupled with the constant unknowns of who will stay and who will leave the church plant has been my biggest challenge.”

6. Physical health

Having balanced or unbalanced health

60% of church planting spouses reported leading more than one major ministry in the church plant or community along with being involved in 2-3 other ministries. It is no surprise they report exhaustion and often burn out in ministry.

Eight Secondary Sources

1. Changed lives

“Walking with people in their journey and seeing their lives changed because of the existence of our church is incredibly exciting.”

“Transformed lives, mine and others, have been the greatest source of satisfaction.”

2. Commitment and sense of call to church planting

“What is our major calling if we have other passions? How do we balance this with the demands church planting places on us?”

“I feel just as called to church planting as my husband. We are both in this together.”

3. Family Time

“My husband keeps his day off and is intentional about building a relationship with our boys. We work hard to build a family focus, identity, and history.”

“I don’t show the kids my unhappiness with their dads lack of participating in our family life. I feel like he spiritually takes care of the church and I take care of the family.”

4. Raising kids

“I really suffer here…often my husband is not a part of what we do as a family. When the church is struggling, the less my husband does for and with the family and the more he wants me to focus on helping him with the ministry.”

“He helps us apply the word to our lives as we go…in devotional time, in the car, around the table.”

5. Church growth

“Having come from a large church it has been discouraging to see the slow growth.”

6. Expectations- from/of self and others

“I didn’t realize how high my expectations were of others. It took me time to realize not everyone has the same calling I have but also that some may not be passionate about seeing others come to know Christ.”

“I have been disappointed with the lack of responsibility and loyalty some people have”.

7. Finances

“Church planting is like starting a business only after the hard work we don’t get the financial payback. It’s hard to give our blood, sweat, and tears to this type of work and not have some sort of financial outcome that we can then pass on to our kids.”

8. Use of gifts and abilities

“I thought I would have an opportunity to use my gifts but with the exhaustion my husband experiences, the needs of our kids, and without having other leaders, most of my time is spent in areas the church needs but not where I’m passionate.”


head_shari_drinkingShari Thomas (GCA Blogger) has been involved with her husband, John, in church planting for over 25 years both in North America and abroad. Shari serves on Mission to North America’s church planting staff as the Director of Parakaleo, a ministry primarily to church planting spouses. Shari and/or Tami Resch (also on staff with Parakaleo) lead the Women’s Forum (6 Sessions) at the North America GCA Conferences & Seminars. John is the director of global training for the Redeemer Church Planting Center in Manhattan, NYC. They have 3 children who amazingly still claim them as parents. They love sailing, only do legal drugs, and are known coffee snobs.


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Five Things New Planters Should Know by Jonathan Dodson

Sunday, July 19th, 2009

Mistakes Poster

It’s been well said, “Undoubtedly the first years of church planting are hardest and most volatile for the church planter – which is why so many churches never make it past their childhood, as the planter implodes under the pressure brought on from lack of resources, exhaustion and loneliness among other factors. A significant factor in survival during the first few years is getting the church planter connected to wisdom and encouragement through other men who have gone before him.”

GCA wants to see this happening through regional church planting networks where church planters are not only coached well but also experience peer-coaching/learning as they share openly with each other lessons learned from both their successes and their failures. Below we pass along some wisdom from Jonathan Dodson, lead planter of an ACTS 29 Network plant called Austin City Life in Texas.


 I.  FUNDRAISING:

Don’t forget to ask the pagans! If you are fundraising, remember that God used the pagan king Cyrus to fund the rebuilding of an entire city. He can definitely handle your church planting needs. Most pagans know more about your city than you do, and some of them love it more than you. Be sure to ask God first and others second when you are fundraising. And don’t forget to ask the pagans.

 

 II. STUDY:

Spend more time with people and less time with books in the first year of church planting. Learn your city, know its lostness, love your city, re-learn how to share the gospel in your context. Most of your reading should be your Bible and what I call “emergency reading”–reading in areas that you are deficient so that you can lead well. Don’t spend inordinate amounts of time in your study or at the library. Spend time with your people, your fellow citizens, your neighbors. Ask them good questions. Fall in love with your target people. The more you know and love them, the more you will be able to share the gospel in a way that makes sense, that strips away misunderstandings of the gospel and slides in truly good news. Deliberate time with people also leads to better applied gospel from the pulpit, better preaching.

 

III. MISSION:

Identify the top 10 Obstacles to the Gospel in your Context. Don’t do this from the armchair, do it from anecdotes (conversations) and cultural exegesis (spending time in pockets of resistance or indifference). Sure, read local authors, newspapers, and magazines, but don’t stop there. Talk deeply with nonbelievers. Ask them what they think of when they here the word “gospel.” Ask them what puts them off from Christianity. Learn from them on mission.

 

 IV. CULTURE:

Identify the top 10 Obstacles to the Church in your Context. Anecdotes and exegesis. Learn the history of hypocrisy in your city or town so that you can apologize and distance yourself from mockeries of the Church. What do people think of when they think “church”?  Have they ever gone to one? Why did they stop? Learn how to talk about and be the church in your cultural context in a way that is biblically faithful and culturally sensitive.

 

V. TECHNOLOGY:

Don’t spend ungodly amounts of money or time on developing your first website. It will all change anyway, several times. You should be with people, not websites and blogs (!). Here are two good, inexpensive web solutions for early stage church planting: Church Root & Clover Sites. If you don’t like social networking, find someone on your team that does. Network through social media, but don’t make it a substitute for spending time with people. More time with people; less time with the screen.

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